Mama Don’t Take My Kodachrome Away

When coming across new blogs, I’m constantly surprised to see that many people are more narcissistic than myself.

That is a tough chew to swallow (is that an expression?)

I mean, I thought no one could love themselves more than me.

My love knows no boundaries.

It’s blinding.

However, I’m finding that people in deed love to take pictures of themselves. In the bathroom, in the car, in the bedroom… wherever they can get it.

I kind of feel like I’m denying the world of something now.

So in honor of the art of self-lovin’, here are classic forms of narcissism caught in their natural state (tell me if I’m forgetting anything):

1.) Bathroom Mirror Shot– (male and female, worse for males)- I hate these photos so much, I almost refused to take one as a joke. Tell me, who still does this? I don’t want to see the contents of your bathroom. I understand that you may have the photography skills of an intoxicated primate but you look like a dude from Jersey. Put your shirt back on. Oh wait, you are a dude from Jersey.

2.) Driving Shot (males and females)- These shots will never look good because you’re too self-conscious about passerbys thinking you’re that asshole that is taking pictures of themselves while driving.

3.) Hipster “I Have Polio In My Legs” Shot (females and effeminate males)- You know what I’m talking about. Every single photo in Lookbook is what. When did scoleosis become in?

4.) The Hipster “Oops I Crapped My Pants Shot” (female)- at an attempt at seeming innocent and caught of guard, most young females end up looking like they shat themselves. Now I understand why bloomers are back in style.

5.) The Kissy Shot– I can’t find the words for this one.

6.) The Cleavage Shot- typically involves cleavage, but when you don’t have any, you try to make it.