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Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey Into Making Me Cry Like a Child

If you want to transform an entire crowd of grown adults into a pile of giddy and gibbering children, show them the award-winning documentary Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey.

Winner of the Sundance 2011 Special Jury Prize, this absolutely fantastic documentary follows the story of Kevin Clash- the man behind Elmo- and his humble beginnings from inner city kid to the voice of one of America’s most beloved characters.

Think you’ll be bored with this documentary? Well, you are thinking WRONG, my friend. I mean, we did all get a little Elmo’d out during the great Tickle Me Elmo Craze of 1996, however, this film makes you forget about Moms elbowing other Moms in the boobs while fighting for stuff animals. In fact, this film is so captivating that I missed the Pee-Wee Herman on Broadway screening at SXSW that I had been anxiously awaiting.

Kevin Clash grew up in the projects of Baltimore during the 1960’s. Being the awesomely nerdy kid that he was, Kevin idolized Jim Henson. He spent (more…)

March 15, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

I Like SXSW Because it Brings Me Closer to My Idols

I can’t get over at how much around this time Austin looks like LA. As I was sitting in a cafe downtown waiting to hook up with my publicist friend at the party for his client, Edgar Wright, and watched all the people in fancy clothing waiting in lines, I thought, “I’m absolutely 100% in Los Angeles again.” However, only in appearance. New Yorkers and Angelenos trickle in by the boat loads during SXSW, but the spirit of the city doesn’t necessarily leave. In fact, the outsiders adapt to us. It’s still good ol’ Austin at the core. Austin brings the best out in celebrities, or it only brings the best celebrities. I’m not sure which. Either way, this point was proven to me when I hung out with one of my childhood idols this weekend.

Friday night my gentleman friend and I went to the opening party for SXSW. The party was hosted in a gargantuan space in the middle of rowdy 6th Street. We were chatting with various folks when I recognized the man standing next to me as Dave Foley. As many (more…)

March 14, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

I Will Use SXSW As My Opportunity to Make Pee-Wee Herman Fall in Love with Me


It’s no secret that I’m kind of in love with Pee-Wee Herman. Kind of meaning that I might name my firstborn King of Cartoons. Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is and will forever remain my number one favorite movie and there may or may not be times that I dress in a tiny gray suit and dance to ‘Tequila’ around my house. Alone. With a bottle of tequila.

With that being said it’s greatly tickling my nether regions to know that Paul Reubens will be at this year’s SXSW debuting his new film, The Pee-Wee Herman Show on Broadway (Sat. March 12th 4:00PM at the State Theatre). Unless you’ve been living under Floory, you will know that the character Pee-Wee Herman recently made a comeback with the Pee-Wee Herman Show which first debuted in LA in 2009 and then made it’s way to Broadway. The sold-out shows and talk show appearances cemented the fact that America still loves Pee-Wee and we’re anxious to have him back. Some more so than others. Some waaaaay more.

Below is an article I wrote for Alternative (more…)

March 8, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

Dear God Please Give Me the Strength to Get Through SXSW

SXSW is starting in eleven days and I’m absolutely shitting my pants terrified in complete denial.

My brain simply does not want to admit the reality that this behemoth is descending upon us like Godzilla with a bad case of diarrhea over Tokyo.

The South by Southwest Interactive/Music/Film festival is so big, they can’t even narrow it down to one category. It has to be three. And not just three rinky dink categories, but three of the largest in the world! SXSW has become a festival like no other. Everyone and their Mom visits Austin and the city functions in a mass state of chaos for ten days until every collectively blacks out.

How big is SXSW you ask? Well, according to the official SXSW website, last year alone there were almost 2,000 musical acts, 300 feature and short films, and 500 interactive events. These are just the official events. What makes SXSW unique is that, unlike many other festivals, there are equally if not more unofficial events surrounding the festival. (more…)

March 1, 2011 by
Music, Pop Culture

The Best Song Lyrics for Facebook Status Updates

People like quoting song lyrics as Facebook/Twitter updates typically for one of two reasons- 1.) They’ve run out of things to say 2.) They think it makes them sound interesting.

However, people often have really shitty taste in music. Take for example this article sent to me by Austin Carnivore from the men’s lifestyle blog MadeMan- “10 Good Music Lyrics for Facebook Status”
#1  is Linkin Park’s “The Catalyst” and includes moving lyrics such as- “God bless us everyone. We’re a broken people living under a loaded gun.”

Damn. That’s some good shit right there. I’m sure men everywhere are thanking you, MadeMan, for representing the male species’ under-appreciated taste in music.

Most of the lyrics I see Tweeted or FB‘d are usually pretty hipstery songs that give the illusion that the poster is wise and insightful. Or give the illusion to the poster that they are giving the illusion that they are wise and insightful. Lot’s of indie crap and references to Joy Division.

Forget Lady (more…)

February 22, 2011 by
Music, Pop Culture

I Still Look Up When You Walk in the Room

Holy crap! I wrote a really long story for the hell of it. 
Let’s just say that I’ve been listening to waaaaay too much Fleetwood Mac lately.

The absolutely best part of the story is when the song he wrote about me came on the radio while we were physically fighting.

That was the hysterical part. What are the odds that that song would play while he was holding my throat against a windshield? I mean, so what it reached #1 back in 2002? Even in my slightly incapacitated state, I found the irony perfect.

I guess this would be the worst part of the story. He held his hand against my throat long enough to make me start to black out but our drummer, Seth, flew out of what seemed like the second story balcony of the hotel and body slammed Ryan to the ground. It seriously was like Spiderman shit. I saw Seth coming in and my eyes must have widened to the size of saucers. Ryan really had no idea what was about to hit him.

They wrestled around on the floor for awhile and the parking lot (more…)

February 16, 2011 by
Music, Pop Culture

Top 4 Songs About Messed Up Relationships

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, which means who gives a shit?

It’s a day for grade-schoolers who are clueless about heartbreak and disappointment and women who send flowers to themselves. For people to buy bottom shelf chocolate for their significant others that will get half eaten and for men to coerce their ladies into having sex with them for the first time in months.

This time of year the TV and radio is littered with cheesy rom-coms and sappy love songs. I dig the cheese fest just as much as the rest of you all, but sometimes it gets old. There really is only so much alone time you can spend with a Marvin Gaye tune, a bottle of wine, a photo of Ryan Gosling above your bed, and a lot of concentration. Not everyone has a significant other on Valentine’s Day. Some people just got dumped. Some people are going through a divorce. Some people are with a partner they resent and despise. Where is their holiday, huh?

So in honor of anti-Valentine’s Day, I’d like to list my top (more…)

February 4, 2011 by
Hipstercrite Life, Music

I Died While Listening to an Arcade Fire Song.


I died while listening to an Arcade Fire song.
It seems apropos, really.
I always secretly wished I’d go out to an epic swell in A minor.
The life soundtrack equivalent to the ending of a Six Feet Under episode.

I wasn’t thinking about anything truly important that moment. The thought that Funeral still remains far superior to any subsequent album released by the band crossed my mind.
Visualizing the dress I was going to be wearing to the dinner on Friday was fighting for the preliminary spot in my brain. I wanted something long and sleek, black…or maybe teal! I was into teal the months leading up to my death.

What I was thinking about foremost was getting home. Home being a relative term, I’m discovering now. What I wanted then was warmth from the cold air. To take off my skirt, put on some sweatpants, and watch that Ryan Reynolds movie sitting in the DVD player. But my actual home will forever exist in the memories of my childhood. The place I grew up. The house my parents (more…)

February 2, 2011 by
Music, Pop Culture

Just Kids: What is Art?


Last night I finished Patti Smith’s book about her relationship with photographer Robert Mapplethorpe, Just Kids. Lying in bed with tears rolling down into my neck, I had so many thoughts racing through my head. Life, death, New York, art, the artist, the idea that a love can transcend multiple planes. I laid still, taking in everything I had just read and letting it permeate. It was a good book and I enjoyed the journey.

However, during my time reading Just Kids, there was an underlying current that kept gnawing at my psyche. An idea that made me question my own views on art and the artist. Mid-way through the book I began questioning the validity of the two characters. I chastised them both for being directionless, for creating for the sake of creating with seeming disregard to what the medium was. To me, they appeared to be waiting for something to stick. Robert in particular bothered me for his creative ambitions seemed to solely revolve around fame and fortune. His creative outlets (more…)

January 21, 2011 by
Music, Pop Culture

Trapped in the Closet: The Audience Participation Guide

Once in awhile a movie comes along that really makes you stop and think. A movie that makes you question the very essence of our existence. The nature of Mankind and the dilemma of choice.

A movie that revives your faith in artists, the act of creating, and the quality of work that is being birthed into the world.

A movie that makes you laugh, cry, sing, jump up and cheer, take off your pants and start humping the living room floor.

A movie like Trapped in the Closet.

There is no finer hip-hopera set in Chicago than R.Kelly’s roman a clef about closet hiding, Beretta wielding, crusty-ass ho’ing, and midget porking. R. Kelly has single-handedly created, owned, and destroyed a genre with this film.

Released in 2005 and 2007, the Trapped in the Closet saga now boasts 22 chapters with more rumored to come. The story follows the epic journey of Sylvester (played by R. Kelly, which coincidentally is his middle name) and the trials and tribulations of being a player in Chi-town. The film begins with (more…)

January 20, 2011 by