But I hope to God the musical choices are not a sampling of things to come…
Can we discuss how handsome Leonardo DiCaprio has gotten? Never been a fan of his dreamy boy looks, but he’s looking gooood with age.
Having been a Fitzgerald nut since I was a teenager, I, and everyone else in the world, have been disappointed with Fitzgerald film adaptations. This trailer looks pretty promising!
OK, gang.
The new blog is up and running.
The final verdict was “Goddamn, East Austin”.
I’m still test-driving the title. Most people and my raunchy self seem to like it, but the lady in me is saying, “What the fuck, Lauren? Do you seriously have to swear all the mother-fucking time?”
My first post is a review of the FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! Salty Sow on Manor Road. Whooooweeee this place is good!
You can follow Goddamn East Austin’s Facebook page here.
And Twitter here.
In the meantime, enjoy this photo of Salty Sow’s Bananas Foster Beignets with nutmeg ice cream.
source: Vice Magazine
I’m neither good at writing poems or having periods…
…And I apologize for alienating my entire male audience today.
I hate you!
Like a seal hates the polar bear
You gobble me up
Chew on every inch of me
And when you’re done
You spit me out
Like a wad of flavorless gum
You sit behind my eyes
And knock knock knock
Trying to break down the door
And when that doesn’t work
You travel down to my stomach
Where you perform your exercise:
Chin-ups and sit-ups and spinning and tread
I’ve always underestimated your powers, Period
Your strength is something I can no longer ignore
We all know you, yet we’re victims to your will
You give us so much
Yet take so much away
See that man over there?
I want to punch him in the face.
Want to know why?
You tell me, Period.
You tell me.
You leave me hopeless
And dismal
And angry at the world
We think (more…)
Hipstercrite isn’t going anywhere. I will be chained to this mo-fo for the rest of my f’ing life.
I decided to start a new blog though. One that I felt didn’t fit the confines of Hipstercrite.
It is a neighborhood blog about East Austin. Sort of in the same vein as Fucked in Park Slope. Except amongst the humor, there will be the occasional crime alert because I believe that stuff is important (i.e. I’m a paranoid crazy).
The blog will have new store/restaurant openings, events, stories, interviews, crime alerts, photos, news roundups and ramblings.
I have the blog all ready to go but I’m not sold on the title. This is where I want you to help me!
Currently the blog is titled “East of Austin”. It’s simple, to the point and references literature (I soundz smart!). However, I’m not sure if it’s too simple? I’d like something a little more unique, but without having a title that a “teenage girl would come up with”, says a friend (i.e. No “Dreaming in East Austin”).
This (more…)
You’ve graduated. Congratulations!
Now — welcome to the jungle. We’ve got fun and games. Life’s not exactly like Axl Rose’s “Welcome to the Jungle”, but sometimes it kind of is. Sometimes it will make you bleed, sometimes it will bring you to your knees and sometimes you learn to live like an animal. Sometimes you’re forced to feel Axl’s serpentine.
Yeesh, that sounded mighty jaded, but I’m turning 29 this year so I’ve developed that obnoxious, “I know everything about your 20s!”-mentality now. The sort of mentality I like to spew upon younger people whether they like it or not.
Like right now. Here are a few things I’ve learned that might help you, too:
It’s OK if you don’t like your career: There is a good chance that you’ll discover the career you went to school for, you end up despising more than all of MTV’s programming once you try it in the real world. It’s OK if you want to switch careers; it’s not a sign of failure. In fact, most twenty-somethings will change (more…)
Have you guys seen this redonk music video from Austin-based Explosions in the Sky yet?
It will cause you to instantly weep and orgasm at the same time.
The music video was created by the very talented Austin filmmakers Peter Simonite and Annie Gunn. This is the sort of artistic creation that makes you wonder what the hell you’re doing with your life.
Last Friday I met David Duchovny.
I have no photographic evidence of this because I met him while he was shooting a scene in his boxer briefs.
There was a lot of hubbub surrounding me meeting David Duchovny from my family and friends. They remembered what a hopeless, pathetic X-files nerd I was between the ages of 10-19. My Dad’s girlfriend, who works on Californication, told me to have my mother ship out any X-files paraphernalia and David would gladly sign them when I met him. My Mom would have happily obliged if I asked her. In fact, she spent most of the week leading up to me meeting David Duchovny telling everyone in our hometown.
As a 28 year-old who previously worked for celebrities, I would never in a million years walk up to David Duchovny with my Australia edition of the Rolling Stone that features he and Gillian Anderson in bed together or my Agent Mulder action figure from Fight the Future and ask him to sign it. That is not a freak flag I want to freely wave to the (more…)
When I lived in Los Angeles I avidly volunteered.
I began volunteering out of selfish reasons of being lonely and bored, but once I saw the deep impact volunteering had on all parties involved, I became hooked.
The organization I volunteered most frequently for was in a dilapidated house in the area between Echo Park and Downtown LA. I guess that area would still be considered Echo Park, but it’s not all the hipsters and bars that one thinks of with that area. It was a moderately dangerous neighborhood that once boasted beautiful houses and elegant businesses. Now the houses have bars on their windows and a smoky smog sheen covering the paint. Broken car window glass litters the street. When I pulled into a nearby convenient store to accurately locate the nonprofit house on my GPS, I watched a stream of rats run alongside my car. In LA, rats aren’t as common as in NYC.
The nonprofit I was going to temporarily houses children from Mexico and Central America who have crossed the (more…)
Visiting LA was amazing and confusing. I never imagined that I would miss LA, but I do. I think?
This week I visited Los Angeles. It was my first extended trip since I walked away from the city of wandering angels.
I met up with old friends and revisited familiar locations that I abruptly left almost four years ago. Jumping into the past is both energizing and intimidating. Will I feel disconnected from my old friends? Will I want to stay in the past? Will this trip trigger an existential crisis that will leave me curled up in a ball screaming, “Who am I?!?”
The longer I’ve lived away from Los Angeles the more I’ve romanticized it. I conveniently forgot the aimless journey I was taking there, long nights crying myself to sleep or staring at the ocean sky hoping life would finally happen.
I moved to Los Angeles when I was 20 after being offered an assistant position at an actor’s production company. It took me five years to realize that I didn’t want to put someone before me (more…)
Yesterday I spent the day in a place I frequent in my head, except this time I was there in person.
The wonderfully quirky world of Venice, California quickly became my favorite part of Los Angeles once I peeled back the sticky layer of sweat, sand, liquor and God knows what else that covers the town and saw what lies below the surface.
Windward Ave.
Venice has not changed a bit since I left four years ago. The only exception is now there is a medicinal marijuana store everywhere you turn. The employees wear green scrubs with marijuana leaves on them and scream at you, “The doctor is in!” It’s only $40 to get your medical marijuana card.
I even saw many of the same street performers who have been performing tricks on the boardwalk for years.
This street performer jumped onto a pile of broken glass
It’s as if Venice has been pickled in time.
I hope it always stays that way.
One of my favorite boardwalk homes designed by Frank Gehry
I relived my regular (more…)