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Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

SXSW Adventures Continued: These Are the Daves I Know

So, the other night we hung out with Dave Foley again. He got us into the green room at the IFC SXSW venue and we hung out with Michael Ian Black, Aziz Ansari, and Thomas Lennon. I was too nervous to say anything to them. The evening then took us all over Austin where at any given time you could see me walking with my arm around Dave Foley, me slapping Dave Foley when he would say something insanely dirty, Dave Foley peeing on the side of a building, and Dave Foley lying down on the ground. Dave was stopped every five minutes with people literally freaking out when they recognized him. Dave got a wee bit tipsy and there is a good chance he may hate us now. It was quite the evening. Here are some snapshots.

March 17, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey Into Making Me Cry Like a Child

If you want to transform an entire crowd of grown adults into a pile of giddy and gibbering children, show them the award-winning documentary Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey.

Winner of the Sundance 2011 Special Jury Prize, this absolutely fantastic documentary follows the story of Kevin Clash- the man behind Elmo- and his humble beginnings from inner city kid to the voice of one of America’s most beloved characters.

Think you’ll be bored with this documentary? Well, you are thinking WRONG, my friend. I mean, we did all get a little Elmo’d out during the great Tickle Me Elmo Craze of 1996, however, this film makes you forget about Moms elbowing other Moms in the boobs while fighting for stuff animals. In fact, this film is so captivating that I missed the Pee-Wee Herman on Broadway screening at SXSW that I had been anxiously awaiting.

Kevin Clash grew up in the projects of Baltimore during the 1960’s. Being the awesomely nerdy kid that he was, Kevin idolized Jim Henson. He spent (more…)

March 15, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

I Like SXSW Because it Brings Me Closer to My Idols

I can’t get over at how much around this time Austin looks like LA. As I was sitting in a cafe downtown waiting to hook up with my publicist friend at the party for his client, Edgar Wright, and watched all the people in fancy clothing waiting in lines, I thought, “I’m absolutely 100% in Los Angeles again.” However, only in appearance. New Yorkers and Angelenos trickle in by the boat loads during SXSW, but the spirit of the city doesn’t necessarily leave. In fact, the outsiders adapt to us. It’s still good ol’ Austin at the core. Austin brings the best out in celebrities, or it only brings the best celebrities. I’m not sure which. Either way, this point was proven to me when I hung out with one of my childhood idols this weekend.

Friday night my gentleman friend and I went to the opening party for SXSW. The party was hosted in a gargantuan space in the middle of rowdy 6th Street. We were chatting with various folks when I recognized the man standing next to me as Dave Foley. As many (more…)

March 14, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Pop Culture

What to Check Out at SXSW Film

So, I lied. I only have a film badge.
However, that makes me really happy because now I don’t feel all this pressure to attend the music-related events. That’s the part that is really stressful, right? RIGHT?!?!

I was lucky enough to be a SXSW film screener this year. I screened the documentary features, but unfortunately none of the films I screened made it to the line-up. 🙁 I screened a lot of wonderful films but I’m sure the films chosen are great too!

I’m putting together my film schedule and the films this year look pretty awesome. Take a look!
P.S. I’m kind of partial to documentaries…

Friday:
The Ballad of Genesis and Lady Jaye 8:30PM Alamo Ritz- This documentary follows the story of performance artist Genesis P-Orridge and his wife Lady Jaye as they try to create one “Pandrogynous” being. Yeah, I had no idea what that meant either, but it looks like the couple is trying to become “one” with each other.


Saturday:
Becoming Santa Alamo Lamar 12:00PM- This doc (more…)

March 11, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

I Will Use SXSW As My Opportunity to Make Pee-Wee Herman Fall in Love with Me


It’s no secret that I’m kind of in love with Pee-Wee Herman. Kind of meaning that I might name my firstborn King of Cartoons. Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is and will forever remain my number one favorite movie and there may or may not be times that I dress in a tiny gray suit and dance to ‘Tequila’ around my house. Alone. With a bottle of tequila.

With that being said it’s greatly tickling my nether regions to know that Paul Reubens will be at this year’s SXSW debuting his new film, The Pee-Wee Herman Show on Broadway (Sat. March 12th 4:00PM at the State Theatre). Unless you’ve been living under Floory, you will know that the character Pee-Wee Herman recently made a comeback with the Pee-Wee Herman Show which first debuted in LA in 2009 and then made it’s way to Broadway. The sold-out shows and talk show appearances cemented the fact that America still loves Pee-Wee and we’re anxious to have him back. Some more so than others. Some waaaaay more.

Below is an article I wrote for Alternative (more…)

March 8, 2011 by
Hipstercrite Life, Pop Culture

Teenage Wasteland

People under the age of 20 scare the living hell out of me.

Teenagers have zero understanding of how life works. Unless they grew up in a Little Orphan Annie-type setting. Then they understand the way life works more than I’ll ever want to know. Because most teenagers are inexperienced with the ways of the world, they are prone to doing terrible and illogical things such as shooting animals, driving drunk, taking dumps in public spaces, and wearing pajama bottoms for pants.

When I think about the potential ways that I am to expire, death by teenager is one of my greatest fears. Teenagers act without knowledge of ramifications. They will shoot you point blank with a smile and then go eat a peanut butter & jelly sandwich. THEY WILL EAT YOUR FIRSTBORN AND THEN USE THEIR RIB CAGES AS TOOTHPICKS.

If you don’t agree with me, take a look at this story that happened on Friday night.

A friend and I were out and about on the hipster-centric east side of Austin. After the bars closed, (more…)

March 7, 2011 by
Film, Hipstercrite Life

Swimming with Sharks: The Life of a Personal Assistant in Hollywood

The style of an assistant- bags under the eyes, frizzy hair, bewildered look on face

There is a time in my life that I rarely discuss on my blog, yet it constituted a significant part of my story. It was the five years I was a personal assistant in Hollywood. I don’t talk about this chapter for a few reasons- 1.) I respect the privacy of my former employers 2.) I consider my former employers friends 3.) I signed confidentiality agreements that would threaten the soul of my first born. Truthfully, the first two are more important to me then the latter. Though there are a lot of fun and crazy stories I’m itching to tell, I would never share them on a public forum.

Last evening I watched the film I was first told to watch when I moved to LA in 2004. That movie is Swimming with Sharks. This indie gem chronicles the complicated relationship between straight-off-the-bus assistant Guy (Frank Whaley) and his heartless, demonic producer boss Buddy (Kevin Spacey). After a year of enduring (more…)

March 2, 2011 by
Austin, Film, Music, Pop Culture

Dear God Please Give Me the Strength to Get Through SXSW

SXSW is starting in eleven days and I’m absolutely shitting my pants terrified in complete denial.

My brain simply does not want to admit the reality that this behemoth is descending upon us like Godzilla with a bad case of diarrhea over Tokyo.

The South by Southwest Interactive/Music/Film festival is so big, they can’t even narrow it down to one category. It has to be three. And not just three rinky dink categories, but three of the largest in the world! SXSW has become a festival like no other. Everyone and their Mom visits Austin and the city functions in a mass state of chaos for ten days until every collectively blacks out.

How big is SXSW you ask? Well, according to the official SXSW website, last year alone there were almost 2,000 musical acts, 300 feature and short films, and 500 interactive events. These are just the official events. What makes SXSW unique is that, unlike many other festivals, there are equally if not more unofficial events surrounding the festival. (more…)

March 1, 2011 by
Hipstercrite Life

My Mom Blog

Mom blogs seem to be all the trend. I’m not sure why.
Don’t people relate better to self-involved twenty-something blogs? I mean reading long-winded soliloquies about ex-boyfriends and designer shoes is something we all enjoy, right?

Whether it be Dooce or The Bloggess or the ten million other popular Mom blogs, exploiting your offspring seems to be where it’s at.

Well, I never told you guys, but I have a daughter. Her name is Luanne and I gave birth to her yesterday. She’s a fantastic child. When she exited the womb she could already talk. Her first word was, “Jesus!”, but I don’t think it was in a “I love Jesus!” kind of way, but more like a, “What the fuck just happened?!” kind of way. We’ll need to teach her not to take the Lord’s name in vain.

Isn’t she a cutie patootie?

I gotta tell you though, Luanne was born hairy as shit. In my drug-induced daze I can even recall the nurses putting their hands up to their mouths and pointing. I have a feeling that the sperm bank lied (more…)
February 28, 2011 by
Film, Pop Culture

The Top 4 Best Career Redemptions

One of the highly anticipated screenings of SXSW 2011 is the Jodie Foster-directed The Beaver starring Mel Gibson and his hand. The film chronicles the story of Walter Black (Gibson)- a depressed CEO, husband, and father who decides to solely communicate with his family and the world with a beaver puppet.

I posted on Facebook that I was very excited about this movie, which led to a barrage of messages suggesting that there was something wrong with me. Why would I possibly want to see a Mel Gibson movie? He’s a anti-Semitic sociopath who conjures up really weird and violent metaphors when venting his anger towards people. Gibson definitely sealed the coffin shut on his career during the second wave of craziness with his ex-baby mama. No one particularly likes Mel Gibson- except for Jodie Foster- who has hung in there with him since the beginning of his downfall. Will she be just the thing to save him with her new movie? Who knows? All I know is that the human story surrounding this movie- (more…)

February 25, 2011 by