Browsing Tag

featured

20-Something, Pop Culture, Writing

Michelle Obama’s DNC Speech Triggered 100 Million Boners

Oh man.

How inspiring was Michelle Obama’s speech at the DNC last night?

Seriously. I’m pretty sure her words instantly cured leprosy and triggered the evolution of dinosaurs coming back to Earth to amicably co-exist with us.

Her speech made me want to strip down to my underwear, give away everything I own and go out into the street and give random hugs to strangers.

While she spoke, it’s as if a spirit entered me. I found myself lifting to my feet  with one hand over my heart and the other waving in the air.

I think today I should find a Baptist church to go to.

I felt it last night and so did a lot of America.

In fact, Americans collectively had a boner for Michelle Obama (and for those who didn’t…we know you have trouble getting it up).

My Twitter and Facebook feeds were filled with gushing comments about the first lady.

It was impossible not to feel emotionally overwhelmed by her flawless and moving speech.

I was going to compile a list of my favorite (more…)

September 5, 2012 by
Hipstercrite Life

On Growing Up: When You Become Too Scared to Jump Into the Water

Last week, a friend asked me how many jobs I currently I have.

As I rambled off the list of regular employment and one-time projects for the month of September, I realized I counted all the way to 14.

It took hearing this to finally legitimize the stress I’ve been feeling lately.

Going freelance means you don’t know how to say no to opportunities. Or at least I don’t, yet.

If a project comes my way that works in my favor, even if it’s not substantial pay, I will take it.

This goes against many writers number one rule, but considering I’m still relatively new at this, I do not harshly discriminate.

Because of this weakness, I’ve found myself working 14+ hour days. Days that leave me mentally and physically exhausted. My back aches, my knees ache and I often trail off into a world of nothingness when speaking to another human being.

I’m not particularly fond of this current employment set up, but it’s “only temporary”, I keep telling myself.

As I’m sure we all do.

After (more…)

September 4, 2012 by
Pop Culture

Happy We Work Too Damn Much Day!

Happy Labor Day!

Hopefully you are NOT working today and NOT on your computer and NOT reading this post.

But if you aren’t one of the lucky ones, I recommend turning your office or restaurant or store into a Michael Jackson dance party. This is what I did for every holiday I ever had to work.

Dancing by yourself in a lonely office or in front of customers makes the sad and pathetic truth that you have to work slightly better.

This is an excellent opportunity to test out all the Thriller dance moves you’ve been practicing in front of the mirror for years. Try to refrain from breaking down and crying when you feel like you’re not successfully completing number 22-24 in the diagram above (or the “Look!-My-Hands-Are-Going-Clockwise-Yes!-I’m-Doing-This Correctly!-Fuck!-Michael-Jackson-Makes-This-Look-So-Easy!-Are-The-Zombies-Dragging-Their-Asses-Like-A-Dog-That-Just-Took-A-Shit-Now?-I-Can-Do-That!” dance move).

If you find yourself struggling with that part of the dance, take (more…)

September 3, 2012 by
20-Something, Austin, Music, Pop Culture

JD Samson Shows Her Support For Austin Music Venue Cheer Up Charlie’s

One of my absolutely favorite owners of the lady mustache, JD Samson, will be DJing at one of my absolutely favorite hangouts spots, Cheer Up Charlie’s, tomorrow starting 3PM-10PM.

Dream combo!

Samson will be there to support Cheer Up as they grapple with the city’s noise ordinance to shut down music before 10PM on weekends and 8PM Sunday through Thursday.

To learn more about the Cheer Up Charlie’s vs. The City & One Cranky Neighbor story, go here.

Details about the event can be found here. Starts at 3PM, $5 at the door, free beer, 1104 E. 6th St.

A Note from Cheer Up Charlie’s about the event (this event is too cool to even have a flyer):

SHOW YOUR SUPPORT FOR CHEER UP CHARLIE’S AND ALL MUSIC ON EAST SIXTH!

The government is telling the kids to turn the music off at 10:00 PM.

You know what? That’s fine. The night salts out game anyways. We are going to turn it up so loud during the daytime for the neighbors, the government, and God herself to better see us.

August 31, 2012 by
Hipstercrite Life

I Am Not a Girl

I’ve never categorized myself as a girl.

In fact, I’ve never even felt like a girl.

I recognize myself as a “woman” and as “Lauren”, but not a “girl”.

I’ll even take “lady”, but no “girl”.

“Girl” conjures up images of monthly hair, manicure and tanning appointments. Weekly shopping trips with girlfriends, yoga classes every other day and nightly wine drinking. All these activities are buoyed by one topic, men, and the ritual of peacocking is an important daily priority.

I know a group of girls who do everything together. Not a day goes by where they don’t see or talk to one another. Their week is filled with exercise classes, lunches and slumber parties enjoyed together. The topic of conversation is typically boys, but often flecked with diet, health and current events. From the outside, I often look at their narrative and want in. I’ve never had what they had. A part of me is wistful, maybe even a little jealous. Here is a sisterhood of girls who will always be there for (more…)

August 30, 2012 by
Hipstercrite Life, Pop Culture

10 Fun Things to Do While You’re on Painkillers

 

Swollen cheeks- check! Jewish nose- check! Unwavering vice on a bottle of Hydrocodone- check!

 

As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, I had my wisdom teeth extracted last week.

What I failed to mentioned is that I was high as a kite on painkillers when I wrote the post.

Er, “high” maybe isn’t the best word.

“Blissfully zoned out and chewing on my tongue” might be better.

This is my first time ever taking painkillers and it’s been an equally enjoyable and terrifying experience.

Enjoyable in that the gaping wound-hole pain gently lifts away and I’m left smiling as I slowly slide down the side of the couch. Terrifying in that my lucid dreaming at nightfall leaves me pissing my pants and confused. One night my boyfriend sneezed and the sound registered in my brain as “OH MY GOD! SOMEONE IS STABBING ME TO DEATH!” and I woke up in tears and hyperventilated for the next ten minutes.

I also tried swallowing my gauze twice.

Though the pain is still sitting idly (more…)

August 29, 2012 by
Austin

Everything You Always Wanted to Know (Or Not Know) About Getting Your Wisdom Teeth Removed

Dudes, I got my wisdom teeth out last Friday.

Let me tell you something, the sound of your teeth cracking like  splintering wood is something you never forget.

NEVERRRR.

After a long gestation, I decided not to go with sedation against the recommendations of many friends.

Luckily, I was only having two teeth removed (one tooth never came into existence and the other is in hiding) and they were relatively easy extractions, otherwise I would have maybe, maybe, gone under.

But not only was it $400 cheaper not to be sedated, but, I’ll be honest, voluntarily putting myself into a  coma is a terrifying thought. It’s even more scary when you hold the knowledge that THREE SEPARATE PEOPLE you know of have died while in the dentist chair. THREEEE!

The alternative to being knocked out is Novocaine, which worked out perfectly.

Since sharing my wisdom teeth perils with friends online and in real life, I’ve discovered that a lot of twenty-somethings are in similar situations that (more…)

August 28, 2012 by
Austin

Announcing the Winner of the Everyone Loves Austin Giveaway (while on painkillers)

Hey Gang!

Sorry for the delay in announcing the winner of the Everyone Loves Austin Tee or Tank Giveaway.

I was in a creative funk this week and in a lot of pain due to my wisdom teeth.

Good news is, I got my wisdom teeth out about two hours ago!

Now you’ll have to listen to me announce the winner of the giveaway on painkillers with my eyes half-closed.

Please email me at laurenmodery at gmail dot com if you’re the winner!

Everything is a-ok right now.

 

August 24, 2012 by
Fashion/Design, Pop Culture

Hipstercrite is in the Glossies!

As I mentioned on Monday, my brain is as fried as the skin of George Hamilton, but I’ll be up and running with some original content next week.

In the meantime, I want to share with you some exciting news!

Hipstercrite was selected to be included in the print magazine The Printed Blog!

What is The Printed Blog, you ask? The Printed Blog is a “monthly chronicle that focuses on creating a collectible, curated publication exclusively made up of content generated on the web, with the intention of giving bloggers credibility and exposure that they can use to establish themselves.” Co-founder and Photo Editor of the magazine is the new It Boy photographer Tyler Shields.

Each issue is comprised of blog posts paired with beautiful photography by contributors. I spied two of my favorite bloggers in the latest issue, Humans Are Funny and Kid in the Front Row!

In their current Deja Vu issue, my super wistful post “This Must Be The Place” was featured. In the blog post I discuss a (more…)

August 22, 2012 by
Hipstercrite Life

Uninspired work is the worst kind

Today I am to announce who won the “Everyone Loves Austin” t-shirt giveaway.

I will do that later.

Right now I don’t feel like writing at all. Not even that sentence.

In fact, these past 8 days have proven difficult in writing emails let alone blog posts. Sometimes I don’t even finish sentences while talking. I trail off, confused as to what I’m saying. I switch out words for other words. Left becomes right, north becomes south.

My brain is so cluttered with stuff, I can’t even tell if I’m writing this sentence correctly or not.

When I read these words aloud in my brain, a hundred other voices compete to make themselves known.

All these conversations battling for hierarchy in my head end up sounding like Peanut’s adult talk.

When I try to be creative, I feel my thoughts running immediately up against a brick wall. I start a sentence only to find it struck down by immovable and nonexistent brain matter. I can see the wall, but I can’t see the words. They are a dust (more…)

August 20, 2012 by