sexual assault Archives

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A Message to Apologists From a Survivor

Hello.

I know the daily news about another man in power being accused of sexual harassment or assault is overwhelming and disorienting.

This is new territory for all us.

I’ve watched some of my own favorite celebrities fall over the past few weeks.

It’s a confusing and weird time.

Sometimes your first thought might be “Why didn’t the victim say anything back then?” or “She/he is jumping on the bandwagon” or “Oh, get over it. It happened 20+ years ago!”

It’s normal to question what is laid in front of you, but I’m writing to you in hopes of shedding those questions and replacing them with understanding, empathy and anger.

As a person who was on the receiving end of deeply humiliating and dehumanizing sexual encounter in Hollywood, I want to add my perspective on some of the questions you may have.

Why didn’t the victim say anything back then?

There are a plethora of reasons why a victim may not come forward at the time:

Fear of assaulter using their power to kill (more…)

December 6, 2017 by hipstercrite

Hipstercrite Life, Thirty-something

Your Mother, Wife or Daughter Has Experienced Harassment or Assault

Inspired by Kelly Oxford’s tweet, I asked my friends and family to share their stories of assault. I was not prepared for the answers I received.

In order to protect the identity of those who were brave enough to share their stories on my Facebook status, I will not share their comments, but I will tell you that within a few hours of asking my peers if they’ve experienced sexual harassment or assault, 50 women responded.

These 50 women wrote of being raped by loved ones, people they trusted.

They wrote of being groped by medical professionals or bosses.

They wrote of having their breasts grabbed or their vaginas or buttholes fingered by friends at school or strangers at a bar.

They wrote of being harassed “too many times to count.”

A few women shared their stories for the first time.

Some shared their stories with me privately.

The stories came from women ages 20 to 70, and they were all difficult to read. However, their responses reconfirmed several truths including (more…)

October 10, 2016 by hipstercrite